But I've just re-read the Chef Boyardee entry. By the way, the generous portion I had packed was a bit much. Was much easier the next day.
Friday I left work. Wished the manager a good trip. He'll be working down in the state where we sent our job. But I've actually enough to do here this week. It will be very hectic. So I'm not sure about posting much more than this today.
We began to hear about the upcoming blizzard. Maybe on Thursday. By Friday night it was an inevitable thing. It was coming. Be prepared. Do not leave homes. All that rot. It would begin about 1 P.M. Saturday. Be warned.
So after a confab at the house, we decided to do food shopping about 12. Just get 2 days errands done in 1. What the Hell.
Well, everyone and their 4th cousin thrice removed was at the grocery store. The parking was horrific. What with the mountains of snow around from the last snow, make that plural.
Actually didn't spend a terrible amount. And tried to make it an easy week for him. Said I wasn't working late and wouldn't be cooking. Menu runs something along these lines.
Sunday baked chicken. Monday chicken parm, I totally cheat and grab 2 cooked breaded slices from the butcher. Tuesday burgers, also from aforementioned butcher. Wednesday grilled cheese, because it's meatless this week. If you know then you know if not it's not important. Thursday should be tuna. Finish off Friday with some pizzas with pre made crusts.
Well first off there was a run on tuna already so didn't get that. The shelves were emptying because of upcoming blizzardzilla. Grabbed a box of coco cheerios and an package of vienna fingers for $1.99. Hell even got a thing of gelato. Oh yeah I was going to really enjoy blizzardzilla.
Next store got the chicken, few veggies, milk. I go to the butcher alone. Well they only had the burgers. Disappointing I figured maybe I'd stop in on Monday.
Got home, consumed yet another portion of spag and meat. What? It's there isn't it? It certainly didn't go bad. Remind me not to tell you that I finished it up on Sunday. Oh nevermind.
I decided to do the bakery run. I just wanted a day where there was not need for me to feel responsible. I got changed, more than a few vienna fingers. And got into bed to wait for the snow. I must've napped a bit. By 4 it was snowing. Like a child I was full of glee.
I've no memory of Saturday nights dinner. I had more fingers, some gelato, and at some point some cheerios. Was I prepared or what.
It really was just nice to have a quiet Saturday night. No guilt about not going out. No urging. No reason to look at the clock and go okay bakery at 7.
Sunday morning. Bizzardzilla was a complete and utter bust. We'd gotten maybe an inch. But I happily had my cronut in bed watching the cooking channels.
Sunday passed well enough. Went out and got some stuff done. Not to much traffic. Stopped by the butcher and got my chicken. Also could not resist these cooked brussell sprouts with pancheta. Had some with the chicken last night. Good stuff. Finishing it with the meatloaf for lunch.
-later
Monday, February 16, 2015
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Smiling like Chef Boyardee
Was just sitting down thinking about how I'm loathing this blog at the moment. More to the point just that it's taken me out of it. I just want to get to the end point. Maybe start anew. Don't concern yourselves, you're invited. Then I picked up my lunch to put in the fridge. I smiled like a lunatic at the sheer weight of it. And that's where we'll stay for this entree.
Sunday when I did the food shopping I wanted something different. Saw this package of what I assume are mini appetizer meatballs. They looked neat. Confirmed with the butcher cooking temp and time.
Sunday did some chicken parm. Monday night did some meatloaf. And while the oven was heated also cooked the meatballs afterwards.
Tuesday came and I did burgers. Quietly complaining about the all beef diet this week, to myself and the dog. And I started to feel kind of excited about the Wednesday.
I realized what called to me about the meatballs. They looked akin to what used to be, we're talking 40 years ago kids, Chef Boyardee spaghetti and meatballs. From a can. The sad amount of enthusiasm. this was bringing out in me was unreal.
This was a real special treat in our house. Partly because it was a named brand. But also, because it was pre made. This wasn't done in my house. It always had an element of excitement that was unrivaled if I remember correctly.
So Wednesday night I got home. Put some sauce in a reliable pot and swirled in my meatballs. Extremely low heat and covered. I put on some good old whole wheat spaghetti.
Cautioned the brother in law that the meatballs might be spicy for him. Let him take his first. Spag on one side of the plate and meatballs on the other. Never shall the twain meet eh? And I did ask him, no he'd never had Chef Boyardee growing up.
I dumped mine together on the plate. In my childlike glee I forgot the parm cheese. It was awesome. This was probably even closer to the original Chef than that stuff they have in a can today. But damn did I enjoy it.
So of course I wrapped up a generous portion for lunch today. Ahh oh joy oh rapture.
This was a real special treat in our house. Partly because it was a named brand. But also, because it was pre made. This wasn't done in my house. It always had an element of excitement that was unrivaled if I remember correctly.
So Wednesday night I got home. Put some sauce in a reliable pot and swirled in my meatballs. Extremely low heat and covered. I put on some good old whole wheat spaghetti.
Cautioned the brother in law that the meatballs might be spicy for him. Let him take his first. Spag on one side of the plate and meatballs on the other. Never shall the twain meet eh? And I did ask him, no he'd never had Chef Boyardee growing up.
I dumped mine together on the plate. In my childlike glee I forgot the parm cheese. It was awesome. This was probably even closer to the original Chef than that stuff they have in a can today. But damn did I enjoy it.
So of course I wrapped up a generous portion for lunch today. Ahh oh joy oh rapture.
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
Weekends
Morning. Short one today.
Saturday. I always like to start early. Just something about having a day off. I'm not one to lay about. Do some errands in the morning. Half an afternoon for myself. B.I.L. would take the first shift at the center. I'd come home round 3. He'd be well into round one of his drinking.
Check to see if she asked him to have me bring something up. I'd go up usually between 5-6. Usual stuff. Talk. Maybe push her around the facility. Say hey to friends. Check if there were activities for the night. Smoke. Bring her back. Get ice.
Ice. A very important last detail of the evening. Sometimes if she felt like it she'd accompany me. Most times though she'd be getting to bed as I went for it.
Get home around 7:30. I was so broke that more often than not I had no plans. So I'd just chill for the night. I'd wake up the drunken one. Usually would go to pick up the take out, he was buying after all. Then chill.
It's funny because of something that happened this morning. He came into the kitchen as I made my breakfast. Asked me if I let the dog out last night. I said no. He didn't close the door of his bedroom to the outside. So it he had been cold. I looked at him and told him, that was why I often just came in as he was nodding off. It wasn't the first time he'd let it happen.
Sunday. Bakery run. Shop for food. Either the lounge or other activities. Again he had the early shift. It's been that way since he came out here to live. Gets everything done by 3 so he can start pounding beer and not leave the house.
The only difference is at some point I told him how to cook the precooked chicken I bought. And put in the potatoes for baking. He usually did this fairly well. Unless there were dishes to be washed.
But that pretty much sums up how my time was accounted for in this and the previous entry. I don't feel like correcting that run-on sentence.
Saturday. I always like to start early. Just something about having a day off. I'm not one to lay about. Do some errands in the morning. Half an afternoon for myself. B.I.L. would take the first shift at the center. I'd come home round 3. He'd be well into round one of his drinking.
Check to see if she asked him to have me bring something up. I'd go up usually between 5-6. Usual stuff. Talk. Maybe push her around the facility. Say hey to friends. Check if there were activities for the night. Smoke. Bring her back. Get ice.
Ice. A very important last detail of the evening. Sometimes if she felt like it she'd accompany me. Most times though she'd be getting to bed as I went for it.
Get home around 7:30. I was so broke that more often than not I had no plans. So I'd just chill for the night. I'd wake up the drunken one. Usually would go to pick up the take out, he was buying after all. Then chill.
It's funny because of something that happened this morning. He came into the kitchen as I made my breakfast. Asked me if I let the dog out last night. I said no. He didn't close the door of his bedroom to the outside. So it he had been cold. I looked at him and told him, that was why I often just came in as he was nodding off. It wasn't the first time he'd let it happen.
Sunday. Bakery run. Shop for food. Either the lounge or other activities. Again he had the early shift. It's been that way since he came out here to live. Gets everything done by 3 so he can start pounding beer and not leave the house.
The only difference is at some point I told him how to cook the precooked chicken I bought. And put in the potatoes for baking. He usually did this fairly well. Unless there were dishes to be washed.
But that pretty much sums up how my time was accounted for in this and the previous entry. I don't feel like correcting that run-on sentence.
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
To many little things.
I find to many little things to really give a flavor here. I have a little time today. Let me tell you about Tuesdays and Thursdays. Maybe that will help. It doesn't really matter which it is. Both were usually identical.
6:45 in the morn. Arrive at work. Talk to the older co-worker Bob. Lost in the shuffling, his last day was Dec. 31 2014. Then I'd hit the gym
8ish. Return. Check work and maybe talk to Bob some more. Lunatic would come in then who knows what.
Afternoon. At some point my sister would call. Always started out with "Hi, it's me your sister." More often than not some request to bring something up that night. Sometimes to talk for a min or 2. Usually the request.
4:30 leave for home.
5:30 arrive home and call to see what else she needed. Often it was papers if B.I.L. arrived before I left. Stella D'oro breakfast treats 3 or 4. Stop at the store for either snow balls or crumb cake. I mean she was already living out of the vending machines. Or sometimes a mountain dew. This would later be changed to orange fanta soda.
6-6:10 Arrive. On her good days she'd already be out of her room. Sometimes met me in the hall, by the guard desk, or in the chandelier room. Not so good days I'd go to her room. Do some light clean up. We had to leave by 6:20 for the smoke.
I've already given you the lay out of the place I believe so I'm not going to do it again.
If we had time and she was in the mood I'd offer to take her out back. Where she'd go often the first 2 times she was there. Sadly, it wasn't a hangout like it had been. We'd often be the only ones there save the cats and geese.
A lot of times we'd do the grand tour before the smoke if no one was there. You were supposed to be there at 6:25, 5 min before. Of course the kid usually showed about 6:45.
Or we'd do the tour afterwards. A lot of the time it was to check the other vending machine.
One ornery day on this side I didn't have any money. All she had was a $10 bill. I told her the machine didn't take them. She told me she'd done it before with no problem. Naturally we didn't get all the change. It was $5 minus 2 purchases. We left a note at the guard station. It would take months to get the money back.
After her friend Ellen was no longer allowed to smoke. The woman was on a lung transplant list, she only had 1 lung. She apparently passed out in the ante room to the smoking. So on the way back we usually stopped by.
On good days we'd stop at a few other pals and check on the activities in the chandelier room.
7:40 Back in her room. I'd go to get her ice and make sure she had what she needed. Usually go the promise of having the paperwork sent home with B.I.L. the next day.
8 home and dinner.
B.I.L. had M,W,F. He was usually home by 7. Visits were a bit more stressful for them both. Often depended on his mood. Like a lot of people. My sister included. He had not concept of how to be a visitor. Trust me. They both visited me in the hospital. No picnic.
But it often depended on how tired she was. There were odd days when I was home by 7 too. If she was just plain tired.
That's it for today.
6:45 in the morn. Arrive at work. Talk to the older co-worker Bob. Lost in the shuffling, his last day was Dec. 31 2014. Then I'd hit the gym
8ish. Return. Check work and maybe talk to Bob some more. Lunatic would come in then who knows what.
Afternoon. At some point my sister would call. Always started out with "Hi, it's me your sister." More often than not some request to bring something up that night. Sometimes to talk for a min or 2. Usually the request.
4:30 leave for home.
5:30 arrive home and call to see what else she needed. Often it was papers if B.I.L. arrived before I left. Stella D'oro breakfast treats 3 or 4. Stop at the store for either snow balls or crumb cake. I mean she was already living out of the vending machines. Or sometimes a mountain dew. This would later be changed to orange fanta soda.
6-6:10 Arrive. On her good days she'd already be out of her room. Sometimes met me in the hall, by the guard desk, or in the chandelier room. Not so good days I'd go to her room. Do some light clean up. We had to leave by 6:20 for the smoke.
I've already given you the lay out of the place I believe so I'm not going to do it again.
If we had time and she was in the mood I'd offer to take her out back. Where she'd go often the first 2 times she was there. Sadly, it wasn't a hangout like it had been. We'd often be the only ones there save the cats and geese.
A lot of times we'd do the grand tour before the smoke if no one was there. You were supposed to be there at 6:25, 5 min before. Of course the kid usually showed about 6:45.
Or we'd do the tour afterwards. A lot of the time it was to check the other vending machine.
One ornery day on this side I didn't have any money. All she had was a $10 bill. I told her the machine didn't take them. She told me she'd done it before with no problem. Naturally we didn't get all the change. It was $5 minus 2 purchases. We left a note at the guard station. It would take months to get the money back.
After her friend Ellen was no longer allowed to smoke. The woman was on a lung transplant list, she only had 1 lung. She apparently passed out in the ante room to the smoking. So on the way back we usually stopped by.
On good days we'd stop at a few other pals and check on the activities in the chandelier room.
7:40 Back in her room. I'd go to get her ice and make sure she had what she needed. Usually go the promise of having the paperwork sent home with B.I.L. the next day.
8 home and dinner.
B.I.L. had M,W,F. He was usually home by 7. Visits were a bit more stressful for them both. Often depended on his mood. Like a lot of people. My sister included. He had not concept of how to be a visitor. Trust me. They both visited me in the hospital. No picnic.
But it often depended on how tired she was. There were odd days when I was home by 7 too. If she was just plain tired.
That's it for today.
Friday, February 6, 2015
This thing didn't work well
Had nothing but problems with getting into this space today. Just kept crashing. I did manage to read some older posts. 2 classics, the dream and the co-worker. Anyway I have to keep this short since the crashes ate up my free time.
The social interaction at the facility was what was really good for my sister. Completely what she lacked at home. Husband drinking only spent 5 min a night with her until it was time to drink himself to bed.
Occasionally I have to restrain myself from saying these things to his face. In the present obviously.
Me? I'd spend some time. I also had the audacity to have my own life as well. Especially since so much of my time was taken up with these 2.
She had an open door policy in the rehab. I'd often arrive and there'd be 1 or 2 of them in her room with her. The thought occurred to me now if she'd made a good day patient. Possibly. They had them come, you know, people who couldn't or shouldn't be left by themselves.
Although as I think on it, the 2 sides, day trippers and residents never mixed so who knows.
Damn it's that time already. I was just feeling a stride for this. Give me 2 min more.
There were little other occurrences. For instance the paper work I kept asking her for to have filled out. Never got done. In fact the lawyer that handled the SSI dropped her because of it. I don't blame him.
Loosing stride. Probably it til the weekend is over. Supposedly getting a storm too. So maybe middle of next week.
The social interaction at the facility was what was really good for my sister. Completely what she lacked at home. Husband drinking only spent 5 min a night with her until it was time to drink himself to bed.
Occasionally I have to restrain myself from saying these things to his face. In the present obviously.
Me? I'd spend some time. I also had the audacity to have my own life as well. Especially since so much of my time was taken up with these 2.
She had an open door policy in the rehab. I'd often arrive and there'd be 1 or 2 of them in her room with her. The thought occurred to me now if she'd made a good day patient. Possibly. They had them come, you know, people who couldn't or shouldn't be left by themselves.
Although as I think on it, the 2 sides, day trippers and residents never mixed so who knows.
Damn it's that time already. I was just feeling a stride for this. Give me 2 min more.
There were little other occurrences. For instance the paper work I kept asking her for to have filled out. Never got done. In fact the lawyer that handled the SSI dropped her because of it. I don't blame him.
Loosing stride. Probably it til the weekend is over. Supposedly getting a storm too. So maybe middle of next week.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Nervous
I will tell you I was not entirely thrilled with her being back in that place. In fact if it wasn't for her friends and her socialization, I would have insisted on a change. There was one other place, a fair distance away that had a gym and could handle bariatric patients
The food had gotten progressively worse. In fact I do believe something they called a stuffed pepper, by 'something' I mean their version, got some of them sick. Food poisoning? Probably.
The first time both places were evenly matched. Oh I checked up on each one when it was brought up. I remember when she had her surgery and the first time they tried to get her into a rehab. The web site started off by saying it had a strong police presence.
This one and the other ranked 2 out of 5 stars. She liked the idea of being so close to home. And the first time was such a good experience. At the time of her going back it was 1.5 out of 5. Currently it is at 1.
So there were little things. I wasn't terribly pleased with the cleanliness. But as with most things it does depend on the patient. She had the where with all to let them know if she wasn't feeling well. This was important. Of course getting to see the Dr. could be a feat unto itself.
I'm trying to set the scene best I can. This was not an ideal place that did get worse. But did the positives out weigh the bad? My feeling was yes. As long as she was somewhat happy, had friends, and could account for herself.
I just did a complete re-edit. I'm sorry I cannot put down the tale of horror. Deal with it.
The food had gotten progressively worse. In fact I do believe something they called a stuffed pepper, by 'something' I mean their version, got some of them sick. Food poisoning? Probably.
The first time both places were evenly matched. Oh I checked up on each one when it was brought up. I remember when she had her surgery and the first time they tried to get her into a rehab. The web site started off by saying it had a strong police presence.
This one and the other ranked 2 out of 5 stars. She liked the idea of being so close to home. And the first time was such a good experience. At the time of her going back it was 1.5 out of 5. Currently it is at 1.
So there were little things. I wasn't terribly pleased with the cleanliness. But as with most things it does depend on the patient. She had the where with all to let them know if she wasn't feeling well. This was important. Of course getting to see the Dr. could be a feat unto itself.
I'm trying to set the scene best I can. This was not an ideal place that did get worse. But did the positives out weigh the bad? My feeling was yes. As long as she was somewhat happy, had friends, and could account for herself.
I just did a complete re-edit. I'm sorry I cannot put down the tale of horror. Deal with it.
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
September
By September things were in a settled rut at the rehab. In fact she'd stopped really even going to the sad little events they put on. Like karaoke night.
There were a few minor sickness scares. Food or bug, never knew which. She was herself in a lot of regard. The 6:30 smoking group. It was actually 6:40 but you had to arrive 5 min early so the door keeper could arrive 5 min late.
There was Mickey. Large guy. He'd been in some sort of accident and couldn't walk. He was hoping to recover. In fact he had a vision. He'd met Jesus who said he could go back but he would have to learn to walk again. So he chose to come back. Me? I would've clocked out right then and there.
"Are you saying I got IN!!!!"
I wouldn't take the chance of blowing it by coming back. But the world isn't me huh?
A new one was a kid named Joe, he'd been in a motorcycle accident. High energy. He was there because of the centers with gym's this was the one that allowed smoking. This apparently is a huge draw.
He and my sister got along quite well. Their rooms were not far. It was nice to see her make friends. In fact she had called me at work one day. She was outside with him, he'd gotten one of those radio controlled cars. They were having a blast.
Astro. Here was someone on oxygen. Yes part of the smoking group. Looked to be late 50's or early 60's. Mumbled at times. But also a nice person. I wouldn't find out why he was there for quite some time.
Ellen came that month I think. She and my sister would become very close. In fact I stay in touch with her. We'll get to tales there later. Eventually she would not be allowed to smoke anymore. She's only one lung. And she passed out from smoking in the area.
I mean there were other side characters. But this was the core group really. Hopefully I'll remember the names I've given them.
There were a few minor sickness scares. Food or bug, never knew which. She was herself in a lot of regard. The 6:30 smoking group. It was actually 6:40 but you had to arrive 5 min early so the door keeper could arrive 5 min late.
There was Mickey. Large guy. He'd been in some sort of accident and couldn't walk. He was hoping to recover. In fact he had a vision. He'd met Jesus who said he could go back but he would have to learn to walk again. So he chose to come back. Me? I would've clocked out right then and there.
"Are you saying I got IN!!!!"
I wouldn't take the chance of blowing it by coming back. But the world isn't me huh?
A new one was a kid named Joe, he'd been in a motorcycle accident. High energy. He was there because of the centers with gym's this was the one that allowed smoking. This apparently is a huge draw.
He and my sister got along quite well. Their rooms were not far. It was nice to see her make friends. In fact she had called me at work one day. She was outside with him, he'd gotten one of those radio controlled cars. They were having a blast.
Astro. Here was someone on oxygen. Yes part of the smoking group. Looked to be late 50's or early 60's. Mumbled at times. But also a nice person. I wouldn't find out why he was there for quite some time.
Ellen came that month I think. She and my sister would become very close. In fact I stay in touch with her. We'll get to tales there later. Eventually she would not be allowed to smoke anymore. She's only one lung. And she passed out from smoking in the area.
I mean there were other side characters. But this was the core group really. Hopefully I'll remember the names I've given them.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Other than that....
Sorry it's late again. I'll try to keep up.
All said and done it was my life. All encompassing once again. Hobbling around on my knee. Visiting my sister, cooking a few nights a week. Dealing with my work situation.
August was sad also. Several departments had their last days at the job. My haven was once again very depressing. Who doesn't dislike saying good bye to people you've known for better than a decade. Not wanting to see the tears in their eyes or let them see the ones in your own. It was rough.
And still the visits to my sister. Small talk. Did you fill out the paper work for social security yet or disability. Yeah you say tomorrow every day.
I had one more appointment with the knee Dr. The cellulitis or however you spell it was gone. The knee had not damage. Exercise was okay, just nothing crazy.
And the knee injury. UGH! It was also what stopped me for looking for a job. I just couldn't imagine limping into an interview and being given a fair chance.
I still tended to baby it and walk carefully. It didn't hurt anymore. But I didn't know what to do. The other person that kept going to the gym, she is a friend, recommended just walking normally.
I was still walking on the ball of my foot. Even though I had full strength and flexibility. But like I said I was babying it. She said it may seem strange, just be careful. And you know what. She was right. I was back to my somewhat normal self within a week.
All said and done it was my life. All encompassing once again. Hobbling around on my knee. Visiting my sister, cooking a few nights a week. Dealing with my work situation.
August was sad also. Several departments had their last days at the job. My haven was once again very depressing. Who doesn't dislike saying good bye to people you've known for better than a decade. Not wanting to see the tears in their eyes or let them see the ones in your own. It was rough.
And still the visits to my sister. Small talk. Did you fill out the paper work for social security yet or disability. Yeah you say tomorrow every day.
I had one more appointment with the knee Dr. The cellulitis or however you spell it was gone. The knee had not damage. Exercise was okay, just nothing crazy.
And the knee injury. UGH! It was also what stopped me for looking for a job. I just couldn't imagine limping into an interview and being given a fair chance.
I still tended to baby it and walk carefully. It didn't hurt anymore. But I didn't know what to do. The other person that kept going to the gym, she is a friend, recommended just walking normally.
I was still walking on the ball of my foot. Even though I had full strength and flexibility. But like I said I was babying it. She said it may seem strange, just be careful. And you know what. She was right. I was back to my somewhat normal self within a week.
Monday, February 2, 2015
Anger and Sadness
There is a last actual post from her on her facebook page in August. After that it was only silly stuff that people put up. You know repostings, pictures of animals and crap like that.
"It's 10 P.M. and I'm crying myself to sleep. I hate being away from home."
Heart tugging and laughable at the same time. I don't need to explain the heart tugging. The laughable part is how true it was that she hated to be away from home. I honestly think she wanted to die at home. But enough of that.
Money of course was tight. B.I.L and I had a go around about getting money from his trust fund. My explaining that it wasn't coming from him or his dearly hallowed F-ING WHORES OF HIS TRUSTEES BRUDDA AND SISTA POO.
To make it worse I couldn't go full out on the arguement because he was a child. And it was close to when my sister would be calling to say good night. She'd hear the tension in his voice and then she would get upset. I tried my best.
But the fact of the matter was that I'd shot my load. I was in August bankrupt.
-sorry it's late.
"It's 10 P.M. and I'm crying myself to sleep. I hate being away from home."
Heart tugging and laughable at the same time. I don't need to explain the heart tugging. The laughable part is how true it was that she hated to be away from home. I honestly think she wanted to die at home. But enough of that.
Money of course was tight. B.I.L and I had a go around about getting money from his trust fund. My explaining that it wasn't coming from him or his dearly hallowed F-ING WHORES OF HIS TRUSTEES BRUDDA AND SISTA POO.
To make it worse I couldn't go full out on the arguement because he was a child. And it was close to when my sister would be calling to say good night. She'd hear the tension in his voice and then she would get upset. I tried my best.
But the fact of the matter was that I'd shot my load. I was in August bankrupt.
-sorry it's late.
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