Hey Merry Christmas,
Not Happy Holidays but yes Merry Christmas! Sitting here in my bathroom plotting my day.
This is not a boo hoo hoo feel bad for me post sorry. No this is just a statement with an explanation. One that I can make here and not elsewhere.
I had a great childhood. Lots of family and such. No shortage. But we must make a distinction here. My fathers family was small. My mothers was large. For whatever reason we stuck with my fathers line.
Now I must not loose my train of thought here. They were fun, but....what is the word I'm lacking. In any case. We generally spent every holiday going to them. Can you spot the thing here. Then they moved 2 and a half hours away. And still every holiday was spent with them.
Again, I enjoyed them, great memories. But even I saw the flaws that would eventually happen. It was a one way street. People die and moves happen. Spent 2 solid years travelling to Florida during this season to see them. Anyone down South or who knows about THE GATOR BOWL, will tell you it's a long drive.
The main patriarch of that branch died. Things loosened up. I on the one hand was grateful for the memories. I was also grateful for the not having to travel anymore as well.
My sister never quite got that far. Always longing for the way things used to be. Please let me reiterate. It is always difficult when talking about family, outsiders don't see all. We always travelled to them. They rarely travelled to us.
Holiday season here is very stressful. Sis wanting to have things back to the way they were. Have had a few holidays ruined by the bratish offspring of that family promising holiday time. Her hopes are always dashed, better things pop up.
My mothers family you may be wondering? Well after decades of not going, what was to be expected. They are always adding to their family and celebrating. I am the stranger at the door to them. I don't blame them. Besides, my sister is having a bitterness with one of my Aunts. That's for another time.
My sister eventually married. A nice tight family that always gets together. It can be a chore to get her to go. Here is a group that likes her and wants to embrace her. And yet she still wants the old family.
Well today out the door she went with hubby to their family. I've been to far to many of their functions in her place. And they aren't anymore my type then I am theirs.
I apologize, if anyone does read this anymore. But phone rang and I've lost train of thought. So I'm getting dressed and going out.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
More unorganized thoughts....
I've come to another road block of sorts. You see I'd invite 2 people here from another site. One I have known for 8 years, the other for 2. The Second is a reader of my blogs and a fan. Also seems to be a very nice person. And in essence is a stranger. Somehow I don't mind that.
The first is a friend of mine you see. 1 of 2 people I would like to meet that I've met over the Internet. Met both of them in the humor chat room. The second of the 2 now reads my blog on the other site. One of the other reasons I don't just close it down.
Lost? Okay. Let's talk about the woman from the Humor chat room. A good friend. That is all I wanted. And we are great friends to this day. Her health has declined badly and such. That happens gang. So what is the problem?
In an earlier post I reference a "relationship" I had with someone from a video game. This would be new news to this woman. It would really be difficult to explain. A lot was going on then too.
I loved the game, as I'd mentioned. The chat room....well it had become in my opinion, elitist. I don't do well in those circumstances. We had to bow and scrape, damned hard over the Internet, to a person. So I spent less and less time there. Thankfully the friendship endured.
You know in writing this. I think I'll expose it. I'll forewarn her there are things she may not know about me. Because here I'm a tad more honest.
Oh, well I never told her about the woman for a few reasons. One, you know how women are, jealous. I also didn't want to be thought less of. And trust me, there was plenty to think less of me about.
I'm not talking about cyber sex for those who grinned there. I mean moreover, a woman that, good grief can I admit this? I fell for, and she cheated? on me several times. Oh that would be a grand explanation eh? It would make an interesting post, Hell just the one where I ended it. Oh well.
The first is a friend of mine you see. 1 of 2 people I would like to meet that I've met over the Internet. Met both of them in the humor chat room. The second of the 2 now reads my blog on the other site. One of the other reasons I don't just close it down.
Lost? Okay. Let's talk about the woman from the Humor chat room. A good friend. That is all I wanted. And we are great friends to this day. Her health has declined badly and such. That happens gang. So what is the problem?
In an earlier post I reference a "relationship" I had with someone from a video game. This would be new news to this woman. It would really be difficult to explain. A lot was going on then too.
I loved the game, as I'd mentioned. The chat room....well it had become in my opinion, elitist. I don't do well in those circumstances. We had to bow and scrape, damned hard over the Internet, to a person. So I spent less and less time there. Thankfully the friendship endured.
You know in writing this. I think I'll expose it. I'll forewarn her there are things she may not know about me. Because here I'm a tad more honest.
Oh, well I never told her about the woman for a few reasons. One, you know how women are, jealous. I also didn't want to be thought less of. And trust me, there was plenty to think less of me about.
I'm not talking about cyber sex for those who grinned there. I mean moreover, a woman that, good grief can I admit this? I fell for, and she cheated? on me several times. Oh that would be a grand explanation eh? It would make an interesting post, Hell just the one where I ended it. Oh well.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Waiting on the Simpsons
I'm sitting here waiting for the Simpson's episode to begin. Trying to make sense out of this blog. Some good threads, some things that definitely need explanations. Oh and of course rambling thoughts....can't have enough of those.
So what is the point? I don't know. This is a place where I come to expose myself like I cannot elsewhere. Have I done that? I say yes. The problem is I've done it in a very haphazard way. It's like a Van Gough where everything is a jigsaw. You are seeing pieces without definition. Not what I really wanted at all.
What I was thinking on is this. Post some pictures and tell a story. Recently, I was looking at old pictures of my youth. Grammar school youth. I think I was truly happy then. Which of course leads to the question am I not happy now?
No, I am not depressed. I do however recognize the difference between happiness as a child and as an adult. Even this year, I have had to come to the realization that time is moving faster.
If we compare childhood to a dog. Bear with me here please. A dog is just simplicity, it wants love and gives love in return. That is if you don't mess it up. We do tend to mess children up you know. Let us not get mired down there. I'm looking for a definition and failing to find it.
Basically my point is this, I loved my childhood as a dog loves its kind master. Undaunted devotion? Sounds a tad foreign, but it makes sense. Despite that my family wasn't perfect, who's is? I really had an awesome childhood. And I am glad for those memories.
That is where I think I would like to start, but who knows if I will. That's it for now.
So what is the point? I don't know. This is a place where I come to expose myself like I cannot elsewhere. Have I done that? I say yes. The problem is I've done it in a very haphazard way. It's like a Van Gough where everything is a jigsaw. You are seeing pieces without definition. Not what I really wanted at all.
What I was thinking on is this. Post some pictures and tell a story. Recently, I was looking at old pictures of my youth. Grammar school youth. I think I was truly happy then. Which of course leads to the question am I not happy now?
No, I am not depressed. I do however recognize the difference between happiness as a child and as an adult. Even this year, I have had to come to the realization that time is moving faster.
If we compare childhood to a dog. Bear with me here please. A dog is just simplicity, it wants love and gives love in return. That is if you don't mess it up. We do tend to mess children up you know. Let us not get mired down there. I'm looking for a definition and failing to find it.
Basically my point is this, I loved my childhood as a dog loves its kind master. Undaunted devotion? Sounds a tad foreign, but it makes sense. Despite that my family wasn't perfect, who's is? I really had an awesome childhood. And I am glad for those memories.
That is where I think I would like to start, but who knows if I will. That's it for now.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Good Morning
Well good morning. It has bee quite awhile. The things in my life have really played with me recklessly. I'm sitting here at 6 something on a cold Saturday morning. I'd forgotten about this place. But October hit me and hit me hard.
October has never been a good month for me. To begin with, it contains both my dad's birthday and the date of his death. Sad yes, tragic no. For some reason the change of season, it's merely summer to fall, affects me.
Sleeping habits change, my heart does some funky things. If I'm going to be late with a bill, it will be in October. And in today's climate that says a whole lot no?
This year started early. The early warning shot was me blowing a tire in the last week of September. No car harm and it is only money, but it started there.
During the first week my manager was away and I was in charge. No great deal, only 1 or 2 mis-haps which I had to answer for. When I tell you I had living nightmares in my sleep. The ones where breath was short, I was being screamed at, and knew it was a dream. One dream in where I was fired. Made for a very long weekend. Yes this I blame on October. Oh and it was no great big deal, just thought I'd drag that in.
At one point my manager had asked me for my e-mail address. I gave the main 1. A mistake. He had it. Why was he asking for it?
Come to find out, I cannot actually make a correlation here, I had more readers of my other blog. And no my manager never emailed me. 1 was a friend request from an ex co-worker. I could go into him at another point. On his page was someone from the legal department.
This caused a great terror in me. You see, I was used to silent readers. Even cousins who did not converse with me. But co-workers current and ex? It was a strange violation into my place of anonymity.
Realizing that this doesn't all seem that terrible, a lot doesn't when you have to write it into coherence, try it.
But I am here, and now must wonder if I will stay. I want something like a picture blog. I've as of late been enamored of my silly childhood. Can you put pictures here?
October has never been a good month for me. To begin with, it contains both my dad's birthday and the date of his death. Sad yes, tragic no. For some reason the change of season, it's merely summer to fall, affects me.
Sleeping habits change, my heart does some funky things. If I'm going to be late with a bill, it will be in October. And in today's climate that says a whole lot no?
This year started early. The early warning shot was me blowing a tire in the last week of September. No car harm and it is only money, but it started there.
During the first week my manager was away and I was in charge. No great deal, only 1 or 2 mis-haps which I had to answer for. When I tell you I had living nightmares in my sleep. The ones where breath was short, I was being screamed at, and knew it was a dream. One dream in where I was fired. Made for a very long weekend. Yes this I blame on October. Oh and it was no great big deal, just thought I'd drag that in.
At one point my manager had asked me for my e-mail address. I gave the main 1. A mistake. He had it. Why was he asking for it?
Come to find out, I cannot actually make a correlation here, I had more readers of my other blog. And no my manager never emailed me. 1 was a friend request from an ex co-worker. I could go into him at another point. On his page was someone from the legal department.
This caused a great terror in me. You see, I was used to silent readers. Even cousins who did not converse with me. But co-workers current and ex? It was a strange violation into my place of anonymity.
Realizing that this doesn't all seem that terrible, a lot doesn't when you have to write it into coherence, try it.
But I am here, and now must wonder if I will stay. I want something like a picture blog. I've as of late been enamored of my silly childhood. Can you put pictures here?
Friday, February 1, 2008
No one cares anyway
I'm sitting here a tad bit numb. Sounds weird huh, well not as weird as it feels. I've begun to really dislike some of the things I've done. No thats not right. Hell I feel abandoned by people I've met on the internet. There I've said the most ridiculous thing I could. And meant it.
Let's start from the begining and see if I can keep it up, so to speak. In 2000 I was 2 years sober and back at home. Got my first computer, a little piece of crap, IBM knock off I think. The internet was big and intimidating. Hell I didn't even have a cell phone yet. After lot of bullshit I found a chatroom, which has since closed some years ago. It was called about.com, I went to the humor room.
Then main 2 people I seemed to bond with were women. Both a little older than me and different from eachother, and friends. One lived in North Carolina and the other lived in Illinois. Good people, lots of fun, great chat. I mean this was when chat was actually conversation. The room had a good group of regulars.
I could go into the minutae of stuff that happened in there but I'll pass at the moment. I don't want to bore myself. I met another friend from that room. An alcoholic, no reformed, who I actually thought was someone else I'd chatted with. Long story.
A lot went down. At this time I'd become involved in an online game. It was a lot of fun, and took place of something that was missing in my life, fun. The chatroom had begun to be cliquy and the residents depressing. There was a snobbery practiced there, so I avoided it a lot.
Singularly, the lowest point in my life. I met and fell in love with a woman IKNEW to be no good. I was tortured for 3 years.
Let's start from the begining and see if I can keep it up, so to speak. In 2000 I was 2 years sober and back at home. Got my first computer, a little piece of crap, IBM knock off I think. The internet was big and intimidating. Hell I didn't even have a cell phone yet. After lot of bullshit I found a chatroom, which has since closed some years ago. It was called about.com, I went to the humor room.
Then main 2 people I seemed to bond with were women. Both a little older than me and different from eachother, and friends. One lived in North Carolina and the other lived in Illinois. Good people, lots of fun, great chat. I mean this was when chat was actually conversation. The room had a good group of regulars.
I could go into the minutae of stuff that happened in there but I'll pass at the moment. I don't want to bore myself. I met another friend from that room. An alcoholic, no reformed, who I actually thought was someone else I'd chatted with. Long story.
A lot went down. At this time I'd become involved in an online game. It was a lot of fun, and took place of something that was missing in my life, fun. The chatroom had begun to be cliquy and the residents depressing. There was a snobbery practiced there, so I avoided it a lot.
Singularly, the lowest point in my life. I met and fell in love with a woman IKNEW to be no good. I was tortured for 3 years.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
There is no title
Saturday. Long story shortened. I went food shopping, had gifts to buy for 3 year old's party on Sunday. I was also informed of a smoke shop about 2 towns away. The 3rd was my favorite errand.
Nice little shop right next to a mason hall. Seeing them a lot lately. I was invited to a dinner and cigar tasting at some point in the past. I declined. Any society that restrictive is not for me. And the amount of mason members that I know and like astounds me. But that is besides the point here.
Shop was nice small. Run by a good kid who didn't scrutinize me like a thief in the humidor. He knew of my shop and was very personable. I bought 2 of the shop brand cigars, excellent stuff. Supposedly he is going national with them. I noticed the lounge.
It looked like what I always thought a lounge would look like. Dark, no windows leather furniture. The shop that I liked and closed was well lit, and the lounge was wonderful and bright.
Back in the new shop. I saw the placard, "Members Only" so I asked. There was a long explanation and it tied into his prices.
His prices I might add were fantastic. I bought 2 here for the price that I would have paid for 1 and an espresso at my old joint.
Yeah I checked out on the long explanation. Most people would have. I will go back to the shop, really like the peppery finish on this smoke. Membership? HAHAHAHAHAHA
$550 a year. Pass.
Nice little shop right next to a mason hall. Seeing them a lot lately. I was invited to a dinner and cigar tasting at some point in the past. I declined. Any society that restrictive is not for me. And the amount of mason members that I know and like astounds me. But that is besides the point here.
Shop was nice small. Run by a good kid who didn't scrutinize me like a thief in the humidor. He knew of my shop and was very personable. I bought 2 of the shop brand cigars, excellent stuff. Supposedly he is going national with them. I noticed the lounge.
It looked like what I always thought a lounge would look like. Dark, no windows leather furniture. The shop that I liked and closed was well lit, and the lounge was wonderful and bright.
Back in the new shop. I saw the placard, "Members Only" so I asked. There was a long explanation and it tied into his prices.
His prices I might add were fantastic. I bought 2 here for the price that I would have paid for 1 and an espresso at my old joint.
Yeah I checked out on the long explanation. Most people would have. I will go back to the shop, really like the peppery finish on this smoke. Membership? HAHAHAHAHAHA
$550 a year. Pass.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Jan 9th-11th
Wednesday. Aggravating day at work. My main mail inserter was on the fritz. Had to wait til Thursday for technician. Was slow in the rest of the place and read paper most of the day. I left regular time. Wasn't all the tired and reckoned I'd head straight home.
1 of the reasons my smoke shop served me so well was the time killing factor. Home for me is not a restful place. Hasn't been for years. So I'd go and sit in the shop and chill for an hour before I get home. No reason to let them know I could be home by 5-5:30 every day.
Well B.i.L was home and I figured that they could have dinner all set. So not the case. Long story short I got fed up, instead of fighting said I was tired and watched T.V. in bed. At some point my sister said she was having toast for dinner. Not good for someone on insulin. But dammit I'm not her keeper. Bed was the only alternative I had. They bug me otherwise. I didn't eat dinner, not the first time for me, and not the worst thing. That was that. Watched ghost hunters, was good shit and then I fell asleep.
Thursday. Work went quickly because I was so damned busy. Left at usual time. Not much overtime to be gleaned in January. And I don't want to get my manager in trouble so I leave at 4:30. Now I really, really, really wanted a cigar. On my way in that morning I saw a large shop that I thought I'd hit. It was huge, nice humidor, odd they sold beer, had a small unused lounge. The guys who owned though, not friendly at all. Very much pay and get out people. I bought a square pressed CAO, nice smoke. And looked for another shop on my way home.
I saw 2. 1 looked very unkempt. The second 1 looked small and seedy. Worse than that the parking lot was loose stone and getting out into rush hour traffic would be a nightmare. 2 cars in the parking lot, 1 had to be a workers at the least. Not my type of place. I'll have to re-read I missed something somewhere. An addendum to Tuesday, I stopped for a beer in a restaurant near my house. Very crowded.
In there I saw 2 people I know fairly well, slight history with them. Not people I would have felt comfortable with. Place has a nice Oak bar that you can literally feel at home at. No seats available. The dude of the couple I referenced, came into the old cigar place. The owners wife always said, and there was proof 1 time that I was there for. Whenever he used the bathroom, #1, he missed a lot.
Friday. I did hit the new cigar place again. Made up my mind not to go back. I really don't like unfriendly shop keepers. Yes bought another CAO. Hit my little coffee shop for a cappuccino. The only guy ever hired there was working, and not a great conversationalist. So I went home and prepared my budget.
1 of the reasons my smoke shop served me so well was the time killing factor. Home for me is not a restful place. Hasn't been for years. So I'd go and sit in the shop and chill for an hour before I get home. No reason to let them know I could be home by 5-5:30 every day.
Well B.i.L was home and I figured that they could have dinner all set. So not the case. Long story short I got fed up, instead of fighting said I was tired and watched T.V. in bed. At some point my sister said she was having toast for dinner. Not good for someone on insulin. But dammit I'm not her keeper. Bed was the only alternative I had. They bug me otherwise. I didn't eat dinner, not the first time for me, and not the worst thing. That was that. Watched ghost hunters, was good shit and then I fell asleep.
Thursday. Work went quickly because I was so damned busy. Left at usual time. Not much overtime to be gleaned in January. And I don't want to get my manager in trouble so I leave at 4:30. Now I really, really, really wanted a cigar. On my way in that morning I saw a large shop that I thought I'd hit. It was huge, nice humidor, odd they sold beer, had a small unused lounge. The guys who owned though, not friendly at all. Very much pay and get out people. I bought a square pressed CAO, nice smoke. And looked for another shop on my way home.
I saw 2. 1 looked very unkempt. The second 1 looked small and seedy. Worse than that the parking lot was loose stone and getting out into rush hour traffic would be a nightmare. 2 cars in the parking lot, 1 had to be a workers at the least. Not my type of place. I'll have to re-read I missed something somewhere. An addendum to Tuesday, I stopped for a beer in a restaurant near my house. Very crowded.
In there I saw 2 people I know fairly well, slight history with them. Not people I would have felt comfortable with. Place has a nice Oak bar that you can literally feel at home at. No seats available. The dude of the couple I referenced, came into the old cigar place. The owners wife always said, and there was proof 1 time that I was there for. Whenever he used the bathroom, #1, he missed a lot.
Friday. I did hit the new cigar place again. Made up my mind not to go back. I really don't like unfriendly shop keepers. Yes bought another CAO. Hit my little coffee shop for a cappuccino. The only guy ever hired there was working, and not a great conversationalist. So I went home and prepared my budget.
Friday, January 11, 2008
Jan 7th-Jan 8th
It has definitely been a rough week, free time wise. Let's see Monday....Monday was absolutely dreadful. Well that's a tad harsh Work was intolerably slow. The resident loon came in high on caffeine. Cartoonishly high. Talking all about how she was switching from next Friday off to Monday because "friends" were taking her to Atlantic City and so on. No energy to go into it just now. Smoked one of the cigars that I get thru the mail on the ride home. Hit my coffee shop, was wonderful. Cappuccino and hot out of the oven chocolate chip cookie. Heavenly.
Tuesday.....I believe that was the day I left work early. Dreadfully slow, as January often is. And we are technically at full staff. Set up for Wed and left. Drove homeward direction. Took a call on the old cell, agreed to attend 3rd birthday party for good friend's daughter. Fun stuff. Does mean Saturday grocery shopping but what the Hell.
See I blew off last years, 1 I was sick. Also there's no parking where they were, and the subway there is a real pain in the ass. Doesn't matter anymore. They wound up buying a house 20 miles away. So even if I wanted to find an excuse to not attend, I couldn't.
Back to Tuesday, I was really missing the Smoke shop. Not so much for my smokes, but for the atmosphere and conversation. I passed along the drive home a couple of smoke shops. Considering replacements. Soooo I hit the library, wandered for a bit, realized why I stopped going to the dang place. And I still had time to kill. When I helped last at the smoke shop my pal gave me a free Teamo. So I lit it up and decided what to do next. Okay definitely didn't care for the Teamo. Was garbage. Drove around considering alternatives and went home. That's enough for today
Tuesday.....I believe that was the day I left work early. Dreadfully slow, as January often is. And we are technically at full staff. Set up for Wed and left. Drove homeward direction. Took a call on the old cell, agreed to attend 3rd birthday party for good friend's daughter. Fun stuff. Does mean Saturday grocery shopping but what the Hell.
See I blew off last years, 1 I was sick. Also there's no parking where they were, and the subway there is a real pain in the ass. Doesn't matter anymore. They wound up buying a house 20 miles away. So even if I wanted to find an excuse to not attend, I couldn't.
Back to Tuesday, I was really missing the Smoke shop. Not so much for my smokes, but for the atmosphere and conversation. I passed along the drive home a couple of smoke shops. Considering replacements. Soooo I hit the library, wandered for a bit, realized why I stopped going to the dang place. And I still had time to kill. When I helped last at the smoke shop my pal gave me a free Teamo. So I lit it up and decided what to do next. Okay definitely didn't care for the Teamo. Was garbage. Drove around considering alternatives and went home. That's enough for today
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Summation of 3rd-7th
Warm cup of coffee in front of me. Work day quickly approaching. Expecting that morning call to step and fetch. Well at least there's more coffee.
The cold only lasted 1 day I'm pleased to say. Got plenty of sleep after the pizza. Thursday yawned widely at me. I'd one of those restful sleeps where all seems well with the world.
Nothing to note about work. Sister had called, the pain in the ass was asking me to get shit for her hubby's B'day. And tell truth I needed supplies for work. So my evening was shot. I cooked...whoop-di-doo. He had traumatic news, for him, tis over now. Did think a bit about the shop.
Friday.....dull and languid. Had a smoke on the ride home. Went to bed early. My goal is that by spring time I will have saved up money enough to start going out again.
Saturday. Weirdness. Decided to do food shopping. But first I returned soda bottles and cans. a little over $25 worth. I've resisted for quite sometime. It used to be the day I'd take mom out. It was her big day. Damn did she love to food shop. Drive around. Sometimes I'd get her stuff from the bakery. Next month will be 3 years. Anyways. Bro in Law had errands to do. So I was left to shop alone, something I quite enjoyed.
At some point my sister called to ask if I wanted B.i.L. to join me. I said no. He actually enjoys food shopping I think.
I got home, he helped bring in groceries, I put them away. Then I proceeded to take down outdoor Christmas decorations. He apparently hadn't to many beers and helped out. Didn't take very long then back inside.
I glared at where the microwave is. Several months ago, my sister broke some kind of heavy glass container. Old stuff you know. Large chunks of debris still hung around and under the micro. I declared it was time to clean. Beer in his hand B.i.L. helped. Lets just say that much of what we tossed was gross. There were even some oyster crackers left back there that mom had bought.
Sunday....I meant to call J&A....didn't. Did some time driving around smoking. Unhappy that I had no place to have a smoke and watch football and talk. Yes Sunday was definitely tough.
The cold only lasted 1 day I'm pleased to say. Got plenty of sleep after the pizza. Thursday yawned widely at me. I'd one of those restful sleeps where all seems well with the world.
Nothing to note about work. Sister had called, the pain in the ass was asking me to get shit for her hubby's B'day. And tell truth I needed supplies for work. So my evening was shot. I cooked...whoop-di-doo. He had traumatic news, for him, tis over now. Did think a bit about the shop.
Friday.....dull and languid. Had a smoke on the ride home. Went to bed early. My goal is that by spring time I will have saved up money enough to start going out again.
Saturday. Weirdness. Decided to do food shopping. But first I returned soda bottles and cans. a little over $25 worth. I've resisted for quite sometime. It used to be the day I'd take mom out. It was her big day. Damn did she love to food shop. Drive around. Sometimes I'd get her stuff from the bakery. Next month will be 3 years. Anyways. Bro in Law had errands to do. So I was left to shop alone, something I quite enjoyed.
At some point my sister called to ask if I wanted B.i.L. to join me. I said no. He actually enjoys food shopping I think.
I got home, he helped bring in groceries, I put them away. Then I proceeded to take down outdoor Christmas decorations. He apparently hadn't to many beers and helped out. Didn't take very long then back inside.
I glared at where the microwave is. Several months ago, my sister broke some kind of heavy glass container. Old stuff you know. Large chunks of debris still hung around and under the micro. I declared it was time to clean. Beer in his hand B.i.L. helped. Lets just say that much of what we tossed was gross. There were even some oyster crackers left back there that mom had bought.
Sunday....I meant to call J&A....didn't. Did some time driving around smoking. Unhappy that I had no place to have a smoke and watch football and talk. Yes Sunday was definitely tough.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Summation Of Day 1
Well well well, day 1 is far over. We stand on the precipice of day 2.
Started my day, full well knowing I was getting over my cold, no huge deal there. I passed by the shop in the ethereal A.M. Sign had been removed and the door covered with brown paper from the inside. I remember grinning feeling the closure of the sight.
At days end I felt O.K. O.K. enough to have a smoke and make my chiropractic appointment. All in all I was still home by 6:15. Hideously early for me. Tired and feeling every ounce of my 3 hours of sleep. Pizza was the dinner item to be ordered.
What does today hold? Well for 1 I'm feeling about 95% better. Work shall be slow-ish. However that's not what I'm concentrating on.
I'm setting my goals on replacing my, let's call it a club, with something new and different. Nature is said to abhor a void, and I do feel a slight void. Why not just go home? Because it has become and unbearable place for me. Stagnation reigns supreme.
Okay so tonight's destination shall be........the library! Yes the library.....why? Well it's a starting point for 1. It is free for 2. And while I'm there I can see what programs and stuff they are offering. It is the weekend that will probably get me the worst....must plan.....something...
Started my day, full well knowing I was getting over my cold, no huge deal there. I passed by the shop in the ethereal A.M. Sign had been removed and the door covered with brown paper from the inside. I remember grinning feeling the closure of the sight.
At days end I felt O.K. O.K. enough to have a smoke and make my chiropractic appointment. All in all I was still home by 6:15. Hideously early for me. Tired and feeling every ounce of my 3 hours of sleep. Pizza was the dinner item to be ordered.
What does today hold? Well for 1 I'm feeling about 95% better. Work shall be slow-ish. However that's not what I'm concentrating on.
I'm setting my goals on replacing my, let's call it a club, with something new and different. Nature is said to abhor a void, and I do feel a slight void. Why not just go home? Because it has become and unbearable place for me. Stagnation reigns supreme.
Okay so tonight's destination shall be........the library! Yes the library.....why? Well it's a starting point for 1. It is free for 2. And while I'm there I can see what programs and stuff they are offering. It is the weekend that will probably get me the worst....must plan.....something...
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
A New Year 2008
It's been awhile. Posting private thoughts where probably no one will read. And if they do they'll have no idea who. BORING.
Okay, my favorite tobacco shop closed down. Last night was it's final night. Why? Unsure, it was successful, however, the landlord did not want to renegotiate the lease.
It stood about 5 years. In the 5 years 31 businesses in my town have opened and closed back down. It was a success. I will miss the place. For many different reasons.
I am a casual cigar smoker. I know shit about cigars, I smoke what I like. The first time I walked in, I can remember commenting that I thought his prices were a little high. Rather than being taken aback or insulted he let it roll of his back. Very cool.
It had 2 large plush leather couches and chairs. 2 televisions. A little bar area in the back. And a bathroom. 3 Humidors, the 2 small ones the size of a refrigerator.
I'd grown to very much enjoy the the place and many of the locals that frequented it. We had military, including 1 person who did photo surveillance in Vietnam. Older surfer types. Someone that worked in the prison as a guard out east. Another local who I've known since childhood, firefighter.
So why am I writing this? Especially when no one will probably read or care. Firstly it is a neat record. But also it marks a very large change in the beginning of the year for me.
It had been a 1 stop on my weekend for awhile. Little place for conversation and some tele. Then when I couldn't get overtime, it was very much my after work stop. So I didn't get home too early. The $2 espresso's did not hurt. And now, I am without my weekend stops and after work stops.
So I may be putting here my journey of new places. You see for me change is good. It makes us keep striving. I'd become to dependant and gotten into a rut with that place. Yes I'm going to miss the Hell out of that place. Yes I'm definitely going to miss the people running it, including his daughter and wife. Yes I will miss the people that I conversed with regularly. People who'd I not have met if not for the place.
But life must continue and I cannot wait to see with what. And tomorrow won't technically count because I've a chiropractor appointment after work.
Okay, my favorite tobacco shop closed down. Last night was it's final night. Why? Unsure, it was successful, however, the landlord did not want to renegotiate the lease.
It stood about 5 years. In the 5 years 31 businesses in my town have opened and closed back down. It was a success. I will miss the place. For many different reasons.
I am a casual cigar smoker. I know shit about cigars, I smoke what I like. The first time I walked in, I can remember commenting that I thought his prices were a little high. Rather than being taken aback or insulted he let it roll of his back. Very cool.
It had 2 large plush leather couches and chairs. 2 televisions. A little bar area in the back. And a bathroom. 3 Humidors, the 2 small ones the size of a refrigerator.
I'd grown to very much enjoy the the place and many of the locals that frequented it. We had military, including 1 person who did photo surveillance in Vietnam. Older surfer types. Someone that worked in the prison as a guard out east. Another local who I've known since childhood, firefighter.
So why am I writing this? Especially when no one will probably read or care. Firstly it is a neat record. But also it marks a very large change in the beginning of the year for me.
It had been a 1 stop on my weekend for awhile. Little place for conversation and some tele. Then when I couldn't get overtime, it was very much my after work stop. So I didn't get home too early. The $2 espresso's did not hurt. And now, I am without my weekend stops and after work stops.
So I may be putting here my journey of new places. You see for me change is good. It makes us keep striving. I'd become to dependant and gotten into a rut with that place. Yes I'm going to miss the Hell out of that place. Yes I'm definitely going to miss the people running it, including his daughter and wife. Yes I will miss the people that I conversed with regularly. People who'd I not have met if not for the place.
But life must continue and I cannot wait to see with what. And tomorrow won't technically count because I've a chiropractor appointment after work.
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